Gone are those days I needed God to prove himself to me! I would say "oh God prove yourself that you are this or that you are that" I have come to understand that God is God irrespective of how I feel or think about him! He is 'I am'! 

My situation does not and will not change God from being God and when he decides to be glorified in my situation, happy I am! So many times, we claim right as sons to demand and foster our will instead of the will of God! 

"God you said this, you said that therefore do it for me as you have said for I am your son..." But honestly a son should be dead to his own will and will not do anything just because it is his right but because it is God's will for him

"...Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done." Apostle Paul also had an understanding of this when he said 

"All things are lawful for me, but all things are not expedient: all things are lawful for me, but all things edify not." 

Some things are just not convenient for sons! Sons do not just seek comfort and a better life but that God be glorified in whatever is happening to them, through them and around them! If it is all for your sake, satisfaction, comfort, pride then, you have to check it and retrace your steps! 

Every promise and every blessing entitled to you in his word is sure for you but as a matter of fact, it comes with timing and seasons! 

And every season comes with a purpose, when the purpose for is season is fulfilled, God is glorified and  you gain increase in capacity and stature and more is committed into your hands for a higher and greater purpose! 

Believe me when I say everything is well programmed and there is no promise or blessing that is given to you for nothing, that is, God makes everything available that is needed in each season to fulfil his purpose. 

It is unfortunate that most of the things we are struggling for are actually irrelevant to fulfilling God's agenda for us at this point in time! 

It is very possible for one to refuse to grow or gain capacity and stature even after season and seasons by refusing to align with God's purpose and as such God cannot entrust to such a person the so much he has in stock for him or her!

 Little wonder so many persons keep struggling even when they believe and confess Jesus as Lord and Saviour!

"Now I say, That the heir, as long as he is a child, differeth nothing from a servant, though he be lord of all; But is under tutors and governors..." 

It is my prayer for you this morning that you will learn to align yourself with God's plan at every point in time that you grow thereby! 

GoodMorningFromIseme

Many lives are complicated, people are entangled with too many complicated situations. "How did I get myself into this? How did it even happen? How did I become a part of this?..." 

Unfortunately, they keep wishing they never gave their concept, accepted the offer, joined themselves to the crew and all of that but even when they realize where they got themselves entangled they almost never take a bold step to freedom either because they feel it is too late or they really do not know how to go about it!

Meanwhile, most of the cases around us are issues birthed from very little things of little or no significance as one may think and carelessly get involve in one way or the other. How could I have known he had an ulterior motive? 

It was one of  those fun Friday nights and I felt hanging out was a way of relaxation after the stress of the week but from that day, my life never remained the same! Many persons find it difficult to define their boundaries as a result they get into trouble because of laxity. 

For crying out loud, you should not be in some companies, be careful what you do, where you go and who you go with at that moment when you feel you need a break! On the other hand, majority of persons who get their lives complicated are persons who are not satisfied with themselves.

They feel bad about themselves, wish they were someone else or had one thing or the other. They easily walk into traps without knowing, be yourself and love your person, it will save you from a lot trouble! 

Again, be careful of anything free, you might actually pay much more than you will want to pay! Most persons got caught in the web through gifts, it is not as if every gift is aimed at destroying you but then, you must not take things for granted and should not always be carried away, you should learn to say no to some offers. 

Especially when you are not of help to such person in any way, you should not only reciprocate respect but everything good! As such, you will not easily accept a favour you cannot reciprocate in anyway especially when you did not ask for it! 

The bottom line is that one should be careful, decisive and disciplined, do not take take things for granted. Sometimes, you may need to dig beyond the surface and probe every act of kindness! 

Why is he being nice to me? Why is she doing this? How long will he do this? What is he going to benefit? Does it cost her anything? Do I deserve this and on what ground? Could this be detrimental to me in any way?... 

Only a foolish man will jump at every offer without a proper assessment, be wise and save yourself from trouble! Meanwhile, if you are already in trouble, do not die in silence. Speak up, talk to the right person about it. 

Trying to cover up will only sink you deeper into trouble, there is no need hiding anything because in due season it will spill out and by then, so many things would have gone wrong. Right now, you can be free if you want to! Think about it!

GoodMorningFromIseme

If we all have to always listen to you talk in every conversation then, you are in trouble already! I mean in every conversation your voice must be heard and it is  dominant, sounding so confident even when you have no idea of what you are talking about! 

Listening is not your thing, you appear to know so much about everything and you are so confident about everything you say. It is either you have a low self-esteem or you lack relational skills!

 Most persons talk too much about themselves to sell their worth to others, they try to make you see them in the light they want you to see them even when you may never see them that way because they are not such!

 They want your admiration and commendations and are ready to convince you with everything they can say, they are simply empty and not even close to the picture they are trying to paint. Like they say "empty vessels make the loudest noise".

 Though, at times it is good you blow your trumpet when no one is doing it for you but it should not be always and with everyone! Making every conversation revolve around you at every point in time is irritating and disgusting! 

You bore your listeners and make them feel foolish for the time they spend talking with you because there is almost nothing to learn from you rather, your attitude is just a show of empty pride and of course they won't be interested in discussing with you next time!

 If actually you are good, you won't need to sell yourself, they will naturally find out, so just be good! Leave yourself out of every conversation and focus on something mutual in that way you will carry your partner along, having his or her full and rapt attention!

 Learn to listen and hear other people out, it makes you wiser, more coordinated and interesting! It's another beautiful Tuesday morning, do have a lovely day! GoodMorningFromIseme

A large number of persons want to be relevant though, they do not know how nor what it really means to be relevant! Everyone wants to be noticed and given that special attention as someone important even when they are not actually significant. 

Being relevant is not just an issue of gaining honour rather, it has its root in how much you have affected the lives of other persons. Your influence is dependent on your impact, the more your impact is felt the more influential you become! 

We all want to be celebrated yet, what actually distinguishes us for honour is our contribution to the lives of people around us. Meanwhile, you don't necessarily need to seek glory instead, just be good, do the best you can to bless others and let your works speak for you. 

If you have to buy or beg for recognition from everyone you will end up with cheap popularity! You will always want to please everyone and impress them even when it is not within your reach, you don't have to force yourself into doing something you know you cannot do or you do not want to do!

 Honestly speaking, we all have our different areas of relevance, I may not be able to offer the help you can render and you may not possess my skills so, we are supposed to be relevant in our different ways!

 You don't have to be someone else to be relevant, be yourself and you will probably even meet needs you had no idea that you could meet and in so doing you are adding value to people. 

Those who are truly relevant had a goal to impact, help and actually add value to others and not just to be recognized, honoured and famous! Meanwhile, you should realize that even bad persons based on their activities win people's attention and recognition because such persons have been affected by them negatively.

People may either feel your impact negatively or positively depending on whether you are making life easy or difficult for them. Becoming relevant is not the same thing as gaining fame and popularity but it is simply meeting a need.

 People will appreciate and honour you not just for your presence but your help. If all you do is for the sake of recognition then, you may never gain satisfaction and fulfilment, true relevance has in it satisfaction and fulfilment! 

And don't forget that people loose their relevance, do not loose yours!

GoodMorningFromIseme

"She called me a wicked person, imagine! When Ieven only trying to make myself comfortable, as if it is now a crime for one to be comfortable and how I'm I suppose to make her feel good about my decisions, moreover I don't even need her to feel good about it..." 

You may not have the intentions of hurting or destroying another person but when you are not considerate you are seen as wicked not because you are intentionally hurting anybody but because you are not kind.

 Kindness may not necessarily mean putting others before you but it means regarding others and the effect of your decisions and actions on them. When you get lost or carried away in your pursuit of a particular thing not considering those that will get hurt or affected especially negatively, you are simply self-centered. 

We will actually find out so many other ways we can do what we want to do and yield better results, if we are sincerely thoughtful about the effects of our decision on those around us. The idea of caring about others naturally does not make most persons smile.

 I don't know about you but for me It's easy to think about myself and just consider what and what I want but at the end of the day we are still not satisfied and others most times are hurting because of our actions. 

Though we cannot consider everyone, it is expected that at least we consider some in that way there will be a fair balance. Meanwhile, it's a wrong ideology some persons have believed that being considerate is an indication of weakness, it is not! 

Rather, some persons that are so self-centered are either having insecurities or inferiority complex, pushing and pushing through with whatever they want is like exercising one's muscles and it gives them a kind of false confidence. Also, it is not discipline as some call it. 

In fact, you will be more effective in  disciplining anyone if you are considerate, if they are aware you have their interest at heart. It does not take much from you instead, it helps you to be more effective as a leader and even as a follower. 

It enhances your relational skills and helps you to be more friendly and approachable! If you must work together with others to achieve a common goal then, the atmosphere must be friendly! 

You can achieve that only when people are sure you care about them and have their interest at heart and not just yours! Be considerate, it will make you a better friend, lover, teacher, leader etc! Have a great day ahead! 

GoodMorningFromIseme

The price of success is hard work, dedication to the job at hand, and the determination that whether we win or lose, we have applied the best of ourselves to the task at hand.

 Vince Lombardi

Anything that is worth our time and attention is worth our dedication as well! If you must do it then, give it your best. "We are just trying it out..." If you don't do the needful even as a trial, you may never get the desired result. 

Even a trial entails much more since you have to see how to make it work and after which you can stick to a plan at the end of the day. So many things we engage in, fail to yield result simply because we never put in our best.

 It is not enough to have expectations for the best! Without putting our best in what we do we are likely not going to get the best outcome. People do most things just to get by without really putting enough time, efforts, and resources for the best.

 What is your best? Your supreme effort for an excellent result is the idea. The difference between your best and worst is different degrees of good which is directly proportional to the amount of your effort. You have tried but how much have you tried?

 A resilient effort is what is needed to achieve the best one can achieve! Obviously, your best cannot be my best, we don't measure our efforts and outcomes against those of others but our goal should be to be better than what we are presently.

 There is this satisfaction that comes with giving your best even when it is nothing compared to what others are doing, that feeling of giving all that is in your power brings satisfaction, peace and joy! But it is painful to do below your ability as a result of lack of dedication. It's a new week, put in your best in all you do this week!

Please note that the broadcast "GoodMorningFromIseme" will now be Tuesdays and Saturdays beginning from tomorrow 12th of February 2019! Thank you!

 GoodMorningFromIseme

The life on social media and internet at large is getting real by the day. And out world is gradually going digital. Before now, internet though a welcome development seemed to be too dangerous due to the activities of fraudsters, there was no trust and none was held accountable! 

Many persons were victims of fraudulence and many were taken advantage of in the name of love especially ladies, who were victimized and some even lost their lives in the process. On the other hand, social media was projected as a world of fantasy, where everything is cool and perfect and many young people especially, were carried away with such illusion and went in pursuit of a life that does not exist. 

But today, it is a different ball game despite the ills and disavantages, the internet is more of a real world. Presently a world of business and commerce like never before. So many business are done online with certainty and satisfaction, the market is no longer limited to digital stuffs but cuts across everything including physical commondties. 

From softwares, applications, ebooks, audios, videos to groceries, clothes, cosmetics, estates and what have you as well as services of all kind! Meanwhile, the internet has given everyone opportunity to sell to the global market, the world at large. As such, the number of entrepreneurs have also increased. 

And the whole concept of entrepreneurship is made simple unlike before since every information one needs is made available including theoretical courses and practical courses. Generally, there are pieces of information on almost everything at little or no cost, thanks to google which has provided information on virtually everything and a solution to every query. 

The smart and the average have both taken advantage of these resources and become knowledgeable and wise. Ignorance is no longer as a result of lack of resources or access to resources but a personal factor such as laziness, lack of interest etc. Unlike in the past, where social media was a platform to show off and appear big and satisfied, recently, it seems to be a den for real and sincere hustlers. 

Even those who initially do not know how to hustle are being influenced on a daily basis which is good! More interesting, we hear of solemnization of holy matrimony of two responsible and wonderful people who got in touch with each other for the first time in a comment box or on a group discussion online. 

Before now, it was hard to believe that one would come in contact with his or her spouse online. Networking of all kind, at every level and in all places has being made possible! The younger generation is positively affected daily through the works of persons like Oluebube amblessed Okafor, Okafor Val etc (Facebook). 

Humanitarian services have gone beyond fulfilling all righteousness or just helping others rather, we see a lot of yong people like the ones mentioned above reaching out to people with great passion and enthusiasm and as well serving as role models and examples for others to emulate. 

Presently, the positivity and advantages of the internet can not be over emphasized despite the ills and disadvantages. If you are still a negative creator or user on the internet, you should change for the better and say no to fraud and everything bad! Meanwhile, if you still think the internet is a trash can for garbage, where nothing is real and authentic or where jobless people go to while away time.

I think you should have a second thought and make necessary adjustment. Life has being made easier, don't remain primitive and struggle uneccessarily. Finally, whoever you are, a creator or user on the internet, in business or relationships, do well to promote everything good and shun evil!

GoodMorningFromIseme

"Without integrity and honour, having everything means nothing" 

Robin Sharma

In our contemporary days, "honour" is no longer what it use to be. In the past, noble men were honoured, people of integrity and honesty were held in high esteem but today our society seems not to recognize such values anymore! Rather, the wealthy, famous and influential are the most honourable people in our society!

 Even when they lack values such as honesty, even when they are unfaithful and irresponsible, they are yet recognized and celebrated! The paradigm shift from values to material gain is the reason we bestow honour on those who do not deserve it. Honouring and celebrating people is like a compass pointing out the way to others. Instead of honour, noble men are despised and looked down on.

 People even describe them as dull and inept weaklings and as such heroic acts are no longer seen in our societies because everyone is after money and riches which has become a measure for everything. Calvin Coolidge said "No person was ever honoured for what he received. Honour has been the reward for what he gave." and I add, not just giving money but noble deeds! 

Imagine, bravery is seen as an attribute of the rich, if you can make money whether legally or illegally you are brave! 

"I would prefer even to fail with honour than win by cheating"

Sophocles

As much as we still have rich and wealthy people with good values yet, all our society of today sees is the money and nothing else. This is why our generation is a generation of cowards, where no one is willing to stand up for what is right. Greed has enslaved so many that they have exchanged honour for contempt and scorn. 

By honouring people, we uphold them for others to emulate, when we honour the right people, others emulate goodness and every value upon which they build nobility! But when the wrong persons are honoured, we promote everything wrong and as well people take after them! Appreciate and honour noble people today and always! 

GoodMorningFromIseme

Imagine waking up each day, Monday to Friday especially and I just keep doing the same thing, in the same manner with the same results over and over again! As much as it is important to set goals and have targets, routine is no guarantee for achieving one's goal as some think. So many persons define routine as consistency but they are two different things, you can be very consistent without a routine and you can have a routine and not be consistent. 

If for instance, my goal today is to write five pages of a book, the most important thing will be that I write those five pages, writing them in the morning or at night or two pages in the morning and three pages at night makes no difference. That is, however you go about achieving your goal should not be the issue, whichever way you do it in as much as you achieve your goal then, you are OK.

 So many persons have been frustrated by daily routine especially with timing, it is less effective than you think. You jump out of bed in the morning, you say your prayers, rush out to prepare for the office. In the office you attend to papers, records, clients etc like you always do. By noon you go for a break and get some food or snacks for launch and you are back to continue from where you stopped. 

By 4pm or there about, you are done for the day and you return home. You get something to eat and finally retire to bed and tomorrow you go over the circle again. You learn nothing new nor experience anything different, nothing challenges you except the usual and that which is common to you and as such your zeal and enthusiasm dwindles each day. 

Soon you do everything just to fulfill all righteousness and working becomes uninteresting and frustrating, you simply just pass time especially when you are an employee. You start looking at your time, praying and hoping time will be a bit faster even when you just arrived the office, because you do not find your job interesting!

 Even in your office, you can do things differently and achieve better results! Routine kills your interest and leaves you dormant!  It hinders creativity and makes you less effective. Creativity gives you the opportunity to express yourself freely! Try do something different today!
GoodMorningFromIseme

We, the People, recognize that we have responsibilities as well as rights; that our destinies are bound together; that a freedom which only asks what's in it for me, a freedom without a commitment to others, a freedom without love or charity or duty or patriotism, is unworthy of our founding ideals, and those who died in their defense.

Barack Obama

As much as it will cost you, do not fail to keep your commitment to a client, friend, blood etc even when it is the least of your priorities since you never know of what priority it is to them. A sole commitment to one's goal without a commitment to others is selfish and self-centered! 

As a matter of fact, our relationship with other people boils down to what we can do for others either for a price in cash or kind or out of benevolence! Even with a price, conscious and unconscious agreement, most relationships end up sour with the right of one person or the other infringed and trampled upon and one or both parties disappointed!

 As a result of irresponsible colleagues who fail to keep to their commitment. Though, sometimes, some dealings are not clearly defined yet, with responsible individuals such can be handled! Your inability to meet up with your obligation may be crumbling someone's entire world unknown to you! 

Giving excuses or complaints for your irresponsibility does not exonerate you in anyway! "I have been busy lately, I have so much on my head right now, I just forgot, something urgent came up..." Rather, your attitude only insinuates that you should not be trusted and that you are the wrong person for the job and any other job! 

It also shows lack of respect and value for those involved, whether formal or informal! Some people even go ahead complaining "if only I knew things will be this way, I would not have accepted in the first place, I did not charge you enough for this job, it is not what I expected, I may just have to back out..." 

It is true you have pressing issues as an individual but your obligation to other persons should not be taken lightly! We are not just responsible for ourselves but for those around us as well, learn to empathize with others more so, when your service is paid for! Taking advantage of people or taking them for granted may be a smart approach for you now but in no time the repercussion will follow!

 For everything we do is a seed which we must reap in due season and of course the more your betrayed and used relationships the lesser your opportunities! Keep to your commitment today, this month and always!

GoodMorningFromIseme

A world of so many intellects, talents and beauties! So many champions and outstanding

 personalities in all walks of life. So much expertise and excellence that threatens the amateur. You just can't help but wonder if there is any space for you, with little or no experience and lack of expertise, you get scared and discouraged. 

It's natural and common for someone in your shoe to be scared but if everyone gives in to fear and discouragement, there would be no professionals. Those whose expertise intimidate you were once amateurs and felt inferior just like you, many of them gave up their pursuit but the few that did not give up turned out to be experts even when the odds were not on their side.

 You have to put your feelings aside and do what you have to do, no one was born competent or an expert despite their talents or inherent abilities, they are all made! Realize that your feelings actually do not make so much difference rather, what you do and how you do it, is what really matters. 

All experts were once amateurs but not all amateurs will end up as experts. So, the choice is yours to make. The making process is not easier for any which makes their decision and resolution very important! Consider the points below:

1. Shun your fears and try! Be rest assured, everyone is scared just like you and you should know that making mistakes is part of the process. If you never made a mistake, you likely never made any effort. Remember, you are almost never going to repeat the same mistake and this makes you smarter.

2. Accept challenges. You must dare to grow and get better! Be courageous enough to take on new and higher responsibilities in that way you put to use your potentials and expand your horizon.

3. Be open to constructive criticism and learn not to take destructive criticism personal. You don't expect everyone to applaud you right? Even those who applaud you only do so to encourage you not because you are so good, I'm sure you know that! Therefore, you must have enough guts to push through even when those around you fail to encourage you.

4. Self examination is another tool you should always use. Self deceit hinders growth and development and it's more virulent than a virus. Be truthful to yourself even when it hurts that's one bitter pill you must gulp down if you must grow!

5. Run at your own paste and do not loose focus! Avoid distraction which can result from delay and disappointments. Do not be discouraged by your paste, no matter how slow just be consistent and focus. It will only take time but you can be assured that you will achieve your goal! I do hope you won't settle for less!

GoodMorningFromIseme

"Men are not prisoners of fate but only prisoners of their own mind"

Franklin D. Roosevelt

I'm sure you've heard the common saying "think outside the box!" What box are we talking about?  The mind of course! A confinement which has restricted and shut many in, away from their environment and others like prisoners. The mind is not just the seat of thought but a nonmaterial substance or set of processes in which consciousness, perception, affectivity, judgement, thinking, and will are based. 

The attitude of every person and the way and manner in which people act, relate, perform etc can be traced to the mind. The life of every man is simply a reality of the mind, the definition of a person is therefore the definition of his mind. No wonder the scripture tells us "For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he..." and "...out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh." 

The quality of your mind determines the quality of your life and limitation in the mind is limitation in life. The mind is patterned and accustomed according to the information it processes and its experiences which makes the mind conscious and alert. And as such, the mind can interpret, rationalize and decide or conclude! A sound mind is an indispensable tool for living. 

Your experiences and the information you get shape your mind, this is one reason so many persons have been limited in life! Many with terrible experiences and scars end up in depression. That is, a low capacity of a person to maintain belief in an institution or a goal, or even in one's self and others. 

Many continue in this state without the willpower to do anything not even the things they use to do, they become too miserable to be useful to themselves or others. As much as you can control and filter the information you take in, you may have little or

 no control over some of your experiences but then, you can decide what takes hold of your mind in every experience. 

In spite of the fact that we experience sometimes the good and other times the bad, you can choose to gather knowledge, opinions, and skills in each case instead of allowing the disappointments and frustration in bad situations cause you depression. Meanwhile, you can broaden the scope of your mind, flexibility is the key! Though, some persons have refused to be flexible with an effort to protect long age beliefs and values. 

But they fail to realize that one can believe wrongly and that people can also be subjective in their values rather than being objective! Therefore, it pays more to be open to learning by acquisition and experience and of course you should know that no learning process forces one to believe or accept anything but rather, it serves as a means to finding out what you should believe and accept! 

Rigidity is resistance which of course limits you to the primitive you and flexibility is no weakness in any form as some think rather, it makes positive changes possible! Life is dynamic therefore, you must be dynamic in your mind! It is a common saying that "change is inevitable"! Refusing to learn and experience something new is shutting yourself away in a confinement or prison with the keys in your pocket! You should think outside the box. GoodMorningFromIseme

"I thought I would be established this time around, I had thought this would be my last try! Things were suppose to blossom this time around but it just turns out to be like every other attempt I have made in the past. I've almost tried everything there is to try but none is working for me! As much as I'm tired of making fruitless efforts I've exhausted my options and this leaves me with nothing else to try..." 

This is one of the reasons so many persons are frustrated and indifferent, they have exhausted their options! For instance, it is known that 90% of startups fail! Hmmmmmm! How come having tried everything they still can't hold on to one and flourish in it? Does it mean they have limited options? Could they be the problem? Honestly, making effort is not all there is to success.

 There are other things one must look out for and put in place if one must be established in whatever he does!  70% of your success is dependent on you in spite of whatever you do. Therefore, majority of the challenges that limit your success have nothing to do with every single option you have tried rather, they have a whole lot to do with you! 

And the fact is, the principles of success are the same regardless of where you apply them. That is why most persons who keep moving from one failed occupation or job, goal to another are almost never successful in anything! The odds are, you may likely not succeed despite your new occupation or goal because of the same reasons you failed in your previous attempts! 

So, the problem is not that you have exhausted your options but that you have actually not identified where you are getting it wrong! The chances are, you will be at least 50% successful with all your trials if you get things right since the problem is most likely from you. What could be your problem? Do you lack focus, concentration or patience? 

You know, most persons do not put in so much as is required for success because they have some other options to jump on. If you have put in a lot in anything, the truth is that you won't jump off so easily, you will exhaust everything within your reach to ensure you achieve your goal or prosper in what you do. But people predict their failure even before they begin and off they go into something else because of lack of focus and concentration. 

Instead, of running off to something else look for how to invest more in what you do and bring out the best in it! Also, there is always a time of waiting before harvest no matter how well you have planted and watered but impatience deprive so many persons from reaping the fruits of their labour. You can flourish in whatever you do with the right dispositions. I think you should check yourself now and review your commitment to what you do! 

GoodMorningFromIseme

"I really do not know what her problem is, she just won't mind her business, I think she just hates me..." You should know that some persons delight in hurting others, it makes them feel good when people feel bad! Such persons can really be frustrating that no matter your effort to live in pace with them, they keep seeking occasion to make trouble. 

The more you try to satisfy and make them happy the more they seek to hurt you especially when you get to see them everyday, maybe at your place of work, in your school or neighborhood. Most of these persons are dissatisfied and messed up, they get mad at your smiles and hate you because life seem favourable for you! 

They wish they have a simple life like yours even when they have no idea what you go through too, they just wish they never have to go through all they go through and end up taking it out on you or the next person. You have tried to ensure there is peace but the harder you try the more difficult it becomes. 

So you tried to be annoying too and reciprocate hate but in return you loose yourself, loose your peace the more and become more upset and confused! As such, they succeed in making you miserable like them. "This is not me, I'm not like this, how did I let her lure me into malice and strife! I know I'm peaceful and I love peace but what in in the world does she want from me, if only she will just let me be..." 

You don't learn to be troublesome neither do you give up being you just to get back at somebody. If you do, you simply create an atmosphere of strife, envy and hate in you which never produces anything good! Soon, you will also complain about everything and loose hope in everything and everybody including yourself! 

If one is not careful, you allow the people around you determine your mood, interrupt your inner peace and bring out the worst in you. Of a truth, so many persons do not care about how they make you feel nor how bad they hurt you so why give them control over your emotions and allow what they do hurt you?

 No matter how frustrating they are, if you learn to ignore them without recognizing or reciprocating their faults, they feel insignificant and frustrated! If you keep complaining and making them the subject matter of every discussion, you give them the right over your joy and peace even your life! Just stop paying attention to them! 

GoodMorningFromIseme

"He won't trust anyone with anything, he wants to be everywhere by himself! He wants to be sure everything is properly done as such he indirectly carries out the instructions he issue to others in the name of supervision." People loose trust in others and their abilities mostly as a result of previous encounters while, some are just hard to satisfy so they always want to do everything themselves. 

First of all, you should realize that there will always be unfaithful, unreliable, incompetent and irresponsible persons but you should not always judge everyone that comes in contact with you base on your experience with such persons. Yes, you have to be careful but you also have to give people the chance to prove themselves, everybody cannot just be the same. 

If not, no matter how effective you are, alone you will only do very little because your circle of influence will be limited. Sometimes, all it takes to entrust others with anything is trusting your instruction and your ability to communicate your expectations to them. Lack of effective communication results in misunderstanding and thereby, hopes are dashed and expectations cut short. 

Growth demands that you have capable hands just like you to stand in for you and even to expand your sphere of influence. You should learn to be satisfied with the efforts and results of others. Some people simply find faults with anything from any other person apart from themselves. Because the job was done by another person, they just find it difficult to see anything good in it rather, all they see is faults but this only limits them and keep them small. 

Such persons are most times not good teammates since they do not appreciate the efforts of others! Even the community at large is a team, so you should learn to be cooperative and supportive. As such, the issue is not just the unfaithful, unreliable, and incompetent but the unbelieving and insatiable as well! 

Fear is one of the reasons people become cautious to a fault, trusting only themselves. You must learn to believe in others and what they can do and as well as trust their judgement if you must work with people successfully.

GoodMorningFromIseme

I felt I should share this story with you this morning, I'm sure you will learn something from it. It happened sometimes early last year. It was a busy day of the week, I had a document to pick up from an office but it was not ready so I had to hang around while they work on it. I went to sit under a tree close by, I saw three ladies taking photos on this beautiful background; one was posing, another the photographer and the third person was waiting. 

They were all happy, giggling and laughing. So, I approached the one waiting for some shots and she was like "what?" with this look of disdain on her face. As though I spoke in French or my request was something too much to ask. I was startled and embarrassed, I just couldn't believe her reactions so I quietly left them and went back to where I was sitting. I was just pressing my phone and one of the ladies said "hello! You want some shots right?" and I reluctantly said yes. 

I wanted to turn her down but I felt she was trying to make up for her friend's attitude. So, I tried to smile for photo sake. Believe me, none of the photos was good not because I was not smiling nor because I'm not beautiful (laughing) but simply because my photographer was just doing it to fulfill all righteousness. You won't believe it, immediately I told her it's OK thanks, she said "please can you take the three of us together?"... Hmmmmm! So this is even the reason she offered to help! 

People most times fail to realize that they do not exist in this world alone!  What will it cost you to be simple and approachable? The truth is that we do not suffice ourselves, you may not need that person you despise but you definitely need somebody. I may not be able to help you but someone else will definitely help you. Of course, I became their photographer while on another beautiful day, a friend of mine took this photo of me on that same background. 

The world is a complicated place for most persons because they do things for instant gratification, living only for the moment but as it is, life does not consist of the present alone but the future as well as the past. That a fellow is not in a position to help you today does not mean he will not tomorrow. Come to think of it, is it too much to put a smile on someone's face by giving a simple courtesy? Sometimes, it is not really in the big big things we do but in the little courtesies we offer. 

Life will be made simple by us and for us if we realize that we need each other and that whatever affects one in one way or the other affect others. If things are fine for the person next to you, you too will benefit but if the reverse is the case you will also be affected. Stop being hard on yourself and others, it won't cost you so much to be nice. Make it a point of duty to make someone smile today, tomorrow and always. 

GoodMorningFromIseme

At times, the best you can do is to step aside and allow whoever is involve to learn experientially even when you are so sure that he will get hurt in the process. Not because you lack counsel nor do you want him to get hurt but because it is the best way for him to understand and learn! Some people may never learn from the experience of others on a particular issue so, no matter what you do to ensure his choice and decision is wise and safe, he sees you as a hindrance or limitation without thinking about what you said or what you have to say. 

Moreover, insisting that he does things the way you think or know is best for him is no longer guidance but overprotection! Of which, you deny him his right to choose and act using his mind and invariably you deny him his right to be independent! Everyone wants to exercise his or her ability to make choices and take decisions whether they are right or not, limiting him is like confining him to your own niche and such restrictions in exercising one's mind negatively affects a person's self-esteem. 

It makes him think less of himself, having no confidence in himself, he sees himself as a moron who can not think nor do things right on his own! When you try to save a situation and the fellow involve does not listen to you, guidance is not forcing him to do what you know is right rather, it is standing by him and pointing out his lessons from his mistakes at the end of the day and as well encouraging him that sometimes our instinct and even our reasoning disappoint us. 

In that way, he becomes receptive to your counsel and you find it easier to pass your message to him though, it may seem as medicine after death but then it serves not just for the moment or present but the future as well, it is no longer just a lecture but a practical class. The aim of guidance is not to ensure and insist on doing the right thing at a particular point in time but to walk a person through his possible options and give your recommendations, the target is beyond making him do the right thing st a particular point in time but to ensure he sees from a clearer and better perspective. 

The most you can do for a person is to influence and help shape his mind through this gradual process, in which he learns from other people's as well as his own experiences.

GoodMorningFromIseme

It's funny how people who know so little but feel they know a lot want others to depend on them for information, knowledge, and counsel though they know nothing. You should be an authority for people to actually depend on you as such meanwhile, no one becomes an authority in a particular field over night without a track record! People are not interested in what you have to say but what you have done, your results and what you are doing. 

They want tested and proven theories not head knowledge, why should I heed your counsel or even come to you for counsel when you have nothing to show for it? The life you live gives credibility to your belief, the principles you teach and the counsel you give. The information you get from a single book can not make you an authority in a field just as a single book cannot make you knowledgeable! 

One book lacks the capacity to answer the too many questions in a particular field so, for the fact you read a book on the subject does not make you an authority. An authority in whichever field is a template, he is not just studious but his life is an experiment! To a great extent, he is certain and his counsel is reliable that he can sometimes predict the future of his field like a prophet base on his knowledge, experience and intuition! 

His knowledge is not just an awareness but an in depth understanding of his field including its history and trends therefore, his ability to predict its future! You may speak eloquently with good charisma, you may be familiar with the subject yet, it does not make you an authority because you lack the touch of reality! It is beyond giving counsel rather, the effectiveness of your counsel is what matters! 

Nobody is interested in principles that are only relevant in an ideal world! So, you must have a track record of success in reality! Meanwhile, you must be willing to learn and learn and keep learning if you must be an authority. It's a new day, rise above the disappointments of yesterday and maximize every opportunity today offers you! You can't afford to allow the troubles of yesterday rob you of today's blessings. Therefore, keep a positive attitude! Do have a lovely day! 

GoodMorningFromIseme

Your attitude towards others and the way you relate with people in general is another key factor that will determine how successful you will be in achieving your goals for the year and beyond. So many persons are simply after extorting others in every relationship they find themselves, they are so much driven by greed. Virtually everything we do involves relationship, we obviously cannot do without people. 

That is why Stephen R. Covey says "Relationship is everything"! Transaction either in business or outside business is something we cannot do without in life, we get involve with different persons and in different relationships daily such as colleagues, neighbours, business partners etc. Apart from family, whatever the relationship is, there is a mutual benefit which is beneficial to both parties. 

Be conscious and cautious how you treat people, any relationship you lost other than exceptional cases will sure affect your success in one way or the other. Just like in business if you treat people badly; deceiving and extorting them you loose them to your competitors in the market so it is in life generally. When you treat people nicely, you earn their loyalty. A polite and honest care with concern and the interest of others at heart brings them back to you. 

It builds confidence and trust in them that anytime they have anything to do with you, they are rest assured, at peace and joyful! This applies to everyone not just those doing business, in as much as you have something to do with others which is obviously inevitable, you should be mindful how you treat them. It takes so much to earn the trust of a person but within a twinkle of an eye trust can be shattered! 

If they don't trust your capability, integrity, sincerity etc they will not want to have anything to do with you, when you are reliable, people entrust you with anything! You relate with others over the things they commit into your care, for instance it takes trust to leave a child in the care of teachers either in the school or church, if not that you trust your pastor you won't sit and listen to him preach and teach. Trust is the reason you keep going to shop in that particular mall... 

Trust is the major reason people keep coming back to you for whatever service you render. People desire to trust you, your character and personality not just your skills and ability. If they can trust your skills and not your character, you are still not reliable therefore, they find it difficult to do anything with you and so many people though very good at what they do yet, they miss opportunities because they are not trustworthy! 

Do not be tricky and cunning in your dealings with others, beyond your actions they judge your motives and people are intelligent more than you know, when they loose trust in you, they will almost never trust you again! If you must be successful this year, you must be honest and trustworthy in your dealings! A single recommendation is enough to change your whole life for the better but who will recommend an unreliable person? 

Of a truth, it may cost you so much but then, it in turn pays you much more and gives you credibility! Decide and be determined to be true to everything you say and do this year, it is better to politely reject a proposal instead of you to deal deceitfully because you were not well paid. Today is 3rd of January, I hope you are already doing something about your goals for the year! Go out this morning and treat people well, you will be amazed if you continue that way! Enjoy your day!

GoodMorningFromIseme